Monday, October 6, 2014

Haunting Hard Rock For Your Halloween


Is there a month more Metal or Rockin’ than October?  Tree’s start to look like skeletons as the leaves fall away.  Oktoberfestival’s going on around the world.  A festival that is largely about mass consumption of beer.  Add a band, a merch booth and a line for the bathroom and it’s exactly like a rock show.  The month climaxes with Halloween.  The one Holiday for kids and adults.  Candy for kids, booze for adults.  And Hallow’s eve is the time of ghosts, witches, demons and of course Satan.  And Satan is the reason why good music exists.  Did the Devil even exist before Rock music?  It’s the one day a year you can dress like a rock star or a whore and not be judged.  And of course the obvious pun, Rocktober.  So let us REJOICE! With Decibel Geek kicking off Rocktober 2014 let's celebrate the most rocking of months with some of the creepiest Hard Rock or Metal songs of all time.  Pour a beverage, light a candle, dim the lights...  if you dare.  I give unto thee (in no particular order)…


The Soundtrack of Hell (or at least a really scary forest) 


Ozzy – Mr. Crowley.  You may want to split hairs over whether he was a true Satanist or just a free thinking theologist who also had a cult but I contend the man was scary as fuck.  You know some crazy shit went on in his house.  This song from Ozzy’s record  will try to lure you in with it’s sympathetic slant but don’t be fooled.  Crowley still walks among us.


Cheap Trick – Hello How Are You.  Bet you didn’t know this song was satanic.  Well it is.  And once you know that you can’t help but think about Rick Nielson and Robin Zander conjuring Demon’s out of Bun E. Carlos in a suburban Chicago garage somewhere.


Black Sabbath – Black Sabbath.  What is this figure in black that stands before me?  No big deal it’s just SATAN sitting there.  And he’s smiling for some reason.  The first time I heard this was on my Walkman as I rode the bus home in 8th grade.  I had to throw away the underwear I was wearing.  Sabbath was never scarier than this song.  


Led Zepplin – Stairway To Heaven.  This record has been played backwards more than forwards.  It’s pretty much common knowledge the everyone in Zep not named John Paul Jones sold their souls to Lucifer in exchange for tight jeans and sex with underage girls.


Motley Crue – God Bless The Children Of The Beast.  Play this for your 12 year old and he’ll never look under his bed again. 


Misfits – Skulls.  I don’t know why Danzig wants my skull but I got a feeling he’s not joking. 


Black #1.  This songs is about some scary slut hooking up with Dracula on Halloween.    Next thing you know your having sex with her and she’s dead.  It even throws some shade on Lily Munster.  That's fucked up.


Justin Bieber – Any song.  This kid scares the fuck out of me.  I don’t know what it is but anytime I hear his *cough* music I become possessed and am overcome with a desire the harm myself by driving my car off a mountain or pouring acid into my ear canal.  Scary shit. 

There are many more I could've included as rock's history is rich with evil.  Have a Spooktacular day and remember to check under your bed and in your closets before turning out the lights.  Happy Rocktober.


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